Make confession and repentance a daily priority in your day. See King David's example of a prayer of repentance in Psalm InChristians of varying denominations eagerly awaited Christ return.
When He didn't come as expected, many abandoned their faith and mocked those who still held on to theirs. Let us take heed lest we fall into the same temptation. In the fall ofmany predicted a financial collapse and many were stirred to action.
Don't go to the analysts for confirmation of what will occur, go to God's Holy, infallible, never-changing, reliable Word--The Old and and New Testament Scriptures.
On December 18,the European Union What this means for the Christian is that God's word is coming to pass when, " On December 1,Germany reaffirmed the sacredness of Sunday as a day of worship to be protected.
What this means for the Chrisian is that the time when the second beast power, with the backing of the first beast power would, " On December?? What this means to the Christian that, " For as in the days that were before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark, and knew not until the flood came and took them all away; so shall also the coming of the Son of man be " Matthew There are two groups of people we can be in during these times.
One group will be looking at the coming crisis and respond with anxiety, fear or worse yet, despair. The other group will be watching, praying and working, and as they see bible prophecy being fulfulled, their faith will be strengthened in the certainty of the coming Christ. This past year has brought about more changes to our world and way of life then we could ever have imagined.
Some have been stirred to action or even more effective, self-examination and prayer. Some have missed the signs, being cleverly distracted by well-timed expositions of Tiger Woods' sins, Michael Jackson's well-publicized death, Rihanna's personal problems and the unprecedented inaugration of the first dark-skinned man in America's Presidental history. Friends, my appeal is simple, " Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not, the Son of man cometh " Matthew I spake unto you, rising up early and speaking, but ye heard not; and I called you, but ye answered not But this thing commanded I them, saying, Obey my voice, and I will be your God, and ye shall be my people: and walk ye in all the ways that I have commanded you, that it may be well with you.
But they hearkened notnor inclined their ear, but walked in the counsels and in the imagination of their evil heart, and went backward, and not forward" JeremiahI have sent unto you all my servants the prophets, daily rising up early and sending them : yet they hearkened not unto me, nor inclined their ear, but hardened their neck: they did worse then their fathers" JeremiahThis is a nation that obeyeth not the voice of the Lord their God, nor receiveth correction: truth is perishedand is cut off from their mouth" Jeremiah Yea, the stork in the heaven knoweth her appointed times; and the turtle and the crane and the swallow observe the time of their coming; but my people know not the judgement of the Lord " Jeremiah For they have healed the hurt of the daughter of my people slightly, saying, Peace, peace; when there is no peace We looked for peace, but no good came; and for a time of health and behold trouble!
For thus saith the Lord to the men of Judah and Jerusalem, Break up your fallow ground, and sow not among thorns. Circumcise yourselves to the Lord, and take away the foreskins of your heart Thus saith the Lord, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old pathswhere is the good wayand walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein. Hear, O earth; Behold, I will bring evil upon this people, even the fruit of their thoughts, because they have not hearkened unto my words, nor to my law, but rejected it.
Will ye steal, murder, and commit adultery, and swear falsely, and burn incense unto Baal, and walk after other gods whom ye know not; and come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, We are delivered to do all these abominations? Is this house, which is called by my name, become a den of robbers in your eyes?
Behold, even I have seen it, saith the Lord " Jeremiah Then said I, Ah, Lord God! But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak. Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the Lord.
Then the Lord put forth his hand, and touched my mouth. And the Lord said unto me, Behold, I have put my words in thy mouth " Jeremiah The priests said not, Where is the Lord? Yet return again to me, saith the Lord A voice was heard upon the high places, weeping and supplications of the children of Israel: for they have perverted their way, and they have forgotten the Lord their God. Through life's journey, God and His love remain constant.
He's promised never to leave us nor forsake us. No wonder Jesus is not a popular person with popular culture. His kingdom is based on teachings that rub against everything we've been taught from childhood. For example, "look out for number one" v. Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus: who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: but made himself of no reputation and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: and being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross" PhilippiansAnd Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, and said, 'verily I say unto you, except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.
Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven" Matthew For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted" LukeSometimes we'll be vindicated in this world and sometimes not, but we don't have to go out there swinging and trying to "get ours.
There is nothing sweeter than when the Lord lifts you up. These are tough times! The world is changing every day, and not for the better. Earth is reeling with the enormous weight of sin.
In mercy, the four angels are holding back the winds of strife. Many are without hope. To live in this earth without hope is a life-robbing experience.
There needs to be a revival of hope in our lives. Some have grown up hearing the gospel message of Jesus birth, life, death, resurrection and soon return. For various reasons, some have lost sight of that blessed hope. Some still cling to the promises of God's word and are able to make it through each day. Be very sure, be very sure, your anchor holds and grips the solid Rock! In times like these you need the Bible, In times like these, O be not idle; Be very sure, be very sure, your anchor holds and grips the solid Rock!
In times like these I have a Savior, In times like these I have an anchor; I'm very sure, I'm very sure, my anchor holds and grips the solid Rock! I'm very sure, I'm very sure, my anchor holds and grips the solid Rock! The following are some of the ways I was disobeying God's commandments, but didn't realize it. My house had the graven images statues and works of artthat were worshipped strategically placed for display and so they would not be meddled with or broken because they were so "precious".
Saying I'm a Christian, but in my private and public life, misbehaving and acting like Satan's servant. Forgetting that the Sabbath was coming and failing to make necessary preparations cleaning, cooking and planning so that our time would glorify God ; Keeping my mind on, and initiating or entering into conversations that drew the focus from God, to self and worldly things 5.
Speaking words to my husband, children or neighbors that kill 7. Defrauding my husband and finding fulfillment in other people; engaging in hobbies and selfish pursuits that draw my mind or time from my wifely duties 8.
Taking office supplies without asking; not speaking up when I'd been undercharged; not alerting the cable company that we were getting more then we were paying for 9.
Making up stories filling in the blanks or guessing about something and making it a fact Wishing that I had a marriage relationship, a home, vacations or talents like other people. Come ye yourselves apart into a deserted place and rest a while Mark Jesus Strange Vine - Various - Songwriters.de - Split Single (CD) that even His disciples needed quiet time to themselves. Even He made it a regular habit to go to some mountainside or secluded place to commune with His Father.
A couple weeks ago, we went to the mountains and stayed with a wonderful family. The area was so quiet and peaceful that the Lord was able to share some wonderful truths with me. I sooo wanted to share them with you, but instead of asking permission to use their computer and working on the blog right then, I presumed to do it when I came back to the city.
Of course, all the precious truths have since left my mind and may possibly be lost forever. I now recognize what the Lord was saying to each of us when he said, "Come ye yourselves apart into a deserted place and rest a while" and why. Our spiritual growth is severely hampered in a place where there is constant noise, distractions, sin and debauchery.
The hustle, bustle, business, wasting of time and foolishness is so overwhelming, and oftentimes alluring, that there is no time or desire to study the word of God. We're always tired, stressed, pressured, pulled and beaten down, that the things of God hold no power or beauty in our lives. Oh, brethren, let us go to those retired places so that we can know what God's will is for our lives. When we feel that things are going out of control, jump off the hamster wheel and let God catch you.
It may mean major lifestyle changes, major opposition from the world, but God will be there to help you. It's getting harder to hear the still small voice of God in all the construction noise, the car horns, the train rattlings, the public cell phone conversations, the news alarms and terror alerts. If He's saying, "this is the way, walk ye in it" Isaiahhow will we know where to go if we can't hear Him?
If you have a Facebook page, please add a link to my Heaven Bound Blog www. I'd like the message to reach as many people as possible. There is something on there that may appeal to anyone, from bible scriptures, current events, recipes, family matters, parenting concerns, etc.
You may add a disclaimer since my views and writing style may not be your own or the method used to communicate the gospel or disseminate information may be different from yours. Thank you very much. Labels: HopeLifestyle. Need Life Insurance? The weight loss was easy. The victory over appetite is not so easy. That requires a constant, daily force of the will. There are eight natural laws of health that God gave to us. They all work in harmony with each other to promote better health and make our lives a little more Strange Vine - Various - Songwriters.de - Split Single (CD).
These laws are nutrition, exercise, water, sunlight, temperance, air, rest and trust in the only Living, only Wise, Immortal God. These principles will be expounded upon later. Some people go cold-turkey with changes and others have to incorporate changes gradually. The good news is that everyone of us can make changes in our lives. We need not be stuck in one place and resign ourselves to defeat. We can do all things through Christ who gives us strenth Philipians First thing this morning, before the cock crew, I had a clash of wills with one of my children.
It was a hard fought battle, but once entered in, it had to be won by me. The challenge was to guide the will of my child without loud-voiced commands, threatenings or force. Immediately, Child Guidanceby Ellen G.
White came to mind and I had to pick it up for encouragement. The chapter entitled, " The Will a Factor in Success " helped me greatly and pointed me to pray to the Lord for strength at that moment.
Before that, in my carnal state, prayer had not even entered my mind. In humility, I bowed my head in prayer and asked the Lord's strength, to which He mercifully and lovingly supplied. Not only did He strengthen me, but as I felt my anger melt away, He also worked on my child to bring her into compliance.
So, with a more surrendered spirit, she went to perform the word that had gone out of my mouth. She even asked for my assistance, which I reluctantly gave. Here the Spirit was calling me to surrender to Him again. Why is the age of twenty a much more mature time for a young person to go to college or to do an apprenticeship program?
The following information is taken from an article from "Family Circle" entitled, "The Young and the Reckless. Even more startling, the last part of the brain to come completely online is the prefrontal cortex, the center of reasoning and judgement. Labels: CharacterFamily Life.
Should not make anything or anyone more important than God 2. Should not set up statues or relics and pray to them or make substitutions for God 3.
Do treat your parents with respect; a long and emotionally healthy life will be the result 6. Should not willfully take a life or destroy someone with hurtful, angry or inconsiderate words 7. Should not engage in emotional or physical affairs 8. Should not cheat in business, take what is not yours; withhold tithe or skimp on offering; rob or burglarize others 9. Should not gossip share others' personal information or lie even if it's a little white one Should not envy or harbor discontentment with what you have; be jealous of others.
If you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. We can easily say, "Lord for give me of my sins", but not have real spirit of repentance for some specific sin. Or there may be a sin that we have let sit for so long that it is forgotten. By being specific, we allow the Holy Spirit to jog our memory and to really make the confession meaningful. Believe me, the Holy Spirit will bring things back to your remembrance.
The likelihood of repeating a particular sin after we have been specific in confession, is slim. Gain the victory over each sin in particular. Each victory will give you confidence to approach the Lord with some other weakness that you need help overcoming. As old sins come back to remembrance, take the time to confess and repent of it right away. Any sin unconfessed is a sin unforgiven. God is willing to aid you. Fight manfully onward, dark passions subdue, Look ever to Jesus, He'll carry you through.
Refrain Ask the Savior to help you, Comfort, strengthen, and keep you; He is willing to aid you, He will carry you through Shun evil companions, bad language disdain, God's name hold in reverence, nor take it in vain; Be thoughtful and earnest, kind-hearted and true, Look ever to Jesus, He'll carry you through.
Refrain To him that overcometh, God giveth a crown, Through faith we shall conquer, though often cast down; He who is our Savior, our strength will renew, Look ever to Jesus, He'll carry you through. Labels: Confession and RepentanceHopeSaints. Labels: CharacterDeceptionTruth. Stuffing their mouths when eating -- When they were now learning to eat solid food and we were feeding them, we'd full up the spoon, so that the process could go faster because we had other things to do.
Sitting patiently and savoring time with our children was not a priority when there were dishes to wash, sports to watch, food to cook, floors to clean and other children to tend to. Swallowing their food and not chewing enough times -- When we were feeding them, we didn't wait for them to chew their food thoroughly before we had another heaped spoonful ready to put into their mouths.
Not respecting when their father, my husband, speaks -- When my husband says something that I disagree with, I'm quick to correct it or voice a better suggestion in front of the children. Over time, they have learned not to take daddy's words seriously or to ask me for my input concerning what he says. I can't be upset with them, I trained them that way. This requires the constant prayer, " Set a watch, O Lord, over my mouth. Keep the door of my lips Psalm Habits of irregularity -- When they were babies, we didn't have a regular schedule for sleep times, wake up times, family worship, mealtimes, recreation, work or anything else.
Everything happened according to our moods, so they grew up with the habits of irregularity. Now that we're trying to maintain heaven's order, it's a struggle, not just for us, but for them, but thanks be to God who giveth us the victory through Jesus Christ 1 Corinthians Not following rules or obeying rules when it was convenient to "self" -- If I [Leuanna] didn't feel like walking the long way, I'd jaywalk; if I wasn't patient, I would not wait for the pedestrian walk signal; if I was late or in a hurry, I'd drive way over the speed limit and the list goes on Shouting at each other or conversing too loud -- Because we didn't enforce rules, weren't consistent or didn't make our word law, they grew trained in habits of disobedience or indifference, so that when we needed them to do something, we'd have to shout to be heard.
Since there was no order in the home, chaos ensued and everyone naturally spoke in loud tones, not being aware of the volume of their voices, so that became the norm. I [Leuanna] also kept the radio up loud that's the way I like my musicso we always had to speak loudly to be heard.
Now that we want to maintain a peaceful atmosphere in the home, it's requires daily diligence to undo the bad habits. Hitting when angry -- And of course, this one. When they did something that crossed "self", my first reaction was to lash out, so when they are upset, they lashed out. Sometimes at me even my sweet, mild-mannered 2 year old had a bout of this disease or they'd lash out at each other. That's what they say, so that's what they did.
Being restlesss or disruptive in the public places doctor's office, church, concerts, seminars, etc. We weren't consistent in encouraging them to sit still for short and eventually longer periods of time.
When they ran off or interrupted us whenw we were speaking, we weren't consistent in correcting those habits. The obvious result is lack of self-control, the inability to sit still when necessary and the habit of being disruptive by talking when others are speaking. I praise the Lord that He has been showing us the truth of our sinful "selves".
He doesn't do it to bring us down, but to bring us up to His standard. As we humble ourselves before Him, He exalts us to a higher standard of living that we can be a blessing and a source of encouragement to others.
We're encouraged to behold healthy families. Too many families are dysfunctional and the human heart naturally becomes what it beholds [that sounds like a good topic for another blog about the TV shows we watch and how that changes our minds to accept adultery, fornication, wrath, lies, covetousness, foolish jesting and the like, as normal].
Let's find healthy families and healthy relationships to be our example and make the bad examples a source of fervent prayer. May God bless your marriages, your children and may your homes if one inhabitant or morebe a little taste of heaven. Hyattsville Seventh-day Adventist Church 42nd Place Hyattsville, MD Pastor for directions after 6pm Last few topics: Yesterday morning we learned what is a cult.
We also learned in the evening what the day prophecy in Daniel means and it's link to the Jewish Sanctuary services. Tonight we will learn what happens after death. These lectures have been powerful and life-changing. All the lectures are rooted in the book of Revelation. This book is no longer a mystery with mystic creatures or events. The fear and confusion is being taken away as truth is revealed and believed. Forgive me, but I don't know the exact title of each lecture.
Mario Torres just gives us what the subject matter will be. Yet ye say, What have we spoken so much against thee? Ye have said, It is vain to serve God: and what profit is it that we have kept his ordinance, and that we have walked mournfully before the Lord of hosts? And now we call the proud happy [blessed]; yea, they that work wickedness are set up; yea, they that tempt God are even delivered. It is not in vain that we the serve the Lord. The fact that God sent His only begotten son as a ransom for your and my sin is evidence that we do not serve Him in vain.
Were it not for His grace, we would be without hope, and that is one thing that we need in this wicked world—- hope. A test of your strength.
Titus Whole Grains — sweet or long grain brown rice, millet, pearled or unhulled barley, soft or hard wheat berries, quinoa, bulgur wheat or steel cut, rolled or oat groats choose 3 or more Nuts — pine nuts, walnuts, pecans, peanuts, cashews, almonds or Brazil nuts choose 1 Sweetener or Flavoring — agave nectar, maple syrup, molasses, honey, almond or vanilla extract, fruit smoothie, apple juice or other juice concentrate choose 1 Spice — coriander, cardamom, nutmeg, vanilla bean, cloves, citrus zest or star anise choose 1 Fresh Fruits — blueberries, bananas, raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, pears and sweet grapes choose 2 Dried Fruit — dates, raisins, cranberries, apricots, shredded coconut, prunes and currents choose 1 Milk — coconut milk, rice milk, almond milk, soy milk, oat milk, hemp milk, carob milk choose 1 store bought or homemade variety.
Labels: HealingRecipes. Tuesday, October 27, L. Children's Living Bible Series. Labels: L. Truthfulness - Conformity to fact or reality; exact accordance with that which is or has been or shall be; true state of facts for things; correct opinion. Definition from SonLight Education Ministry Curriculum "Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbor: for we are members one of another.
Truth is of God; deception, in every one of its myriad forms, is of Satan; and whoever in any way departs from the straight line of truth is betraying himself into the power of the wicked one.
Yet it is not a light or easy thing to speak the exact truth. We cannot speak the truth unless we know the truth; and how often preconceived opinions, mental bias, imperfect knowledge, error of judgement, prevent a right understanding of matters with which we have to do! How do you get around walls? This, my friends, is how not to live your lives. Tear down the walls, let passion be your guide and call in sick for work if that boat decides to turn around — be prepared to capsize.
To hell with responsibility. Buy that sports car, scale that wall and ride off into the sunset until you find your happily-ever-after. A shot of tequila should help get you started, the rest is up to you. Some might call it a mid-life crisis…screw those people. Trust me on this one. I have to quit being a fan and start being the lucky lady that I am. Things quickly went downhill again soon after the catfish festival.
Sometimes a red light shone through the small back window, other times a soft yellow light, but most of the time it was pitch black. I returned home from work one evening to find my roommate complaining about our postal service. I walked it over to them.
It was the green house. Must be his maid or something. That letter was obviously meant for me! The blog comments continued. The mysterious lightshows continued. The synchronicities worsened as did my mental state, but I kept returning to social media to find the answers I sought. Who, exactly, were these people anyway? I was torn between my belief that River was alive and in contact with me, and those commenters who were quickly becoming my enemies.
Is this the big one? I wait for signs and hope to God I interpret them correctly. America is in over her head as WWIII looms in the distance waiting for an ill-prepared guard to falter and shoot himself in the foot.
The shot heard round the world. Wait for the smoke to clear. Please Mr. Communication breakdown. Pray for our nation, well, I have been. I weep for our brothers in arms. Land of the free…what on earth will it take? I just wish we spoke the same language. Insomnia strikes again. How many vacation days do I have left? Definitely calling in tomorrow. Hmmm, heartache? Collapsed lung? Straight-jacket blues? Untraceable and not an all-out lie. I just wish we all spoke the same language. Together we stand, divided we fall.
Perhaps it was over before it began. Satan is the prince of confusion, I must keep that in mind. When heart and mind meet, you find clarity, if only temporary. I have nothing left to hide now do I? I breed butterflies. I play the part whenever needed, create characters, put on Halloween masks — whether pre-programmed or not, abuse leaves you with more than one face.
The End. This drive-thru movie is officially closed to the public. Everyone was in on it. My coworkers, my family, the neighbors, the delivery guy, the Jehovah Witnesses. My dogs. I suspected my own friends and family of turning on me. The man wearing a white shirt driving a red truck at the Dairy Queen was in on it. Stray dogs on the loose were in on it. The radio stations were in on it. The man in the grocery store pushing an empty basket in the automotive section was in on it.
Because he was wearing a yellow bracelet and a blue hat while tapping his foot! I mean, who pushes around an entire basket for one item? Also, my coworker who used to go on break with me but recently quit coming around, he too wore a yellow bracelet! I had never noticed it before, so I asked him about it and then he sent me a friend request on Facebook!
I left work without telling anyone that day and raced home because I thought River was mad at me. Through posts on Facebook from the guy I thought was River in disguise, I was led to believe that he was leaving me.
Comments back and forth between him and his friends sent me into a crazed emotional state. I was in social media hell. What I was apologizing for, who knows? With my face red and streaked with tears, I somewhat gained my composure and drove back to work. On my way out of the neighborhood a stray Huskie limped by on the side of the road.
I stopped to help and tried to give it water, but it only growled and limped away. As I was about to leave, a man also stopped to help and pulled out a blue mat from his car. The dog immediately came to him and he thanked me for trying to help.
EdgarI thought, same name as my good friend and coworker who recently became a born-again Christian. I figured River was somehow involved. I broke down that night. Once I got back to work, I stayed for about an hour and then told my boss I had to leave due to a family emergency. I stopped by the store, picked up a bottle of wine, and collapsed into bed sobbing.
My mental state could no longer be ignored, and I finally attempted to tell my roommate about it. We sat in the garage with the door open as I chain-smoked and tried to explain my situation.
I sobbed uncontrollably and told her I just needed her to be there for me, to listen and to not judge. She was my best friend, my confidant, my partner in crime, and my family, but this, this was beyond her understanding.
The social media, the synchronicities, the blog, the comments, the strangers at work, I laid it all out to her as best I could. It went against every ounce of my being, but I finally told her.
In a hushed voice, I confided in her that I thought River Phoenix was alive and living next door to us. I think the color drained from her already pale face. The neighborhood dogs began barking uncontrollably and a man could be heard talking loudly on his phone as if to drown out my traitorous confession.
A stray cat peaked its head around the corner through the door, meowed, and then quickly ran away. I told her I went over there at four in the morning and knocked on the door but that nobody answered. Everything fell silent. The dogs, the man on the phone, us. I sat alone in the garage and chain-smoked. I could feel them watching me.
Someone coughed loudly in the distance and I heard what sounded like a squealing pig come from the corner of the room. Stains on the walls transformed into distorted faces as I shivered and sweat and tried to catch my breath. We left for a mini vacation the next day and traveled to Nixon, Texas to visit some relatives who owned a ranch.
It was just what I needed. Get away, drink some beer, fire off a few rounds and drink some more beer, maybe some whiskey. I promised my roommate I would try to better explain what was happening in my life, but in the end, I told her to just drop it.
In the end we got drunk and brushed it under the rug, buried it under the floorboards, and moved some heavy furniture over it for good measure. She would never understandI thought. A hurricane blew in that weekend and the satellites went down where we were staying. For the time being, I was cut off from social media. I stared out my bathroom window as the lights flashed on and off and the curtains shook back and forth.
I was sucked in once again. How did this thing turn on me? Black] is involved. The radio stations are involved. My co-worker is involved.
The helicopters flying over my house are involved. The brown truck with the Jesus sticker is involved. I have too much proof. What the hell is going on? Lights off. Complete blackout. Those are the only two conclusions to draw. I do have reason to believe my house is bugged. Hide from the light. Dance monkey dance. This must be what fame is like, my every move scrutinized with absolutely no privacy.
No wonder River lied a lot. Nobody wants to expose their dirty laundry, not all of it anyway. No wonder River took drugs. Mean comments and posts that I took as direct attacks began popping up on Facebook and my cyber friends became overnight critics. Judging me, playing me, baiting me, loving me, hating me, mean cats, wounded dogs — I was a slave to Facebook, my fans, my obligations, my need for confirmation and acceptance, my Hollywood.
If I had the wealth and the know-how I might consider faking my own death. I want to run away. I want my life back. I am River Phoenix.
I emulate him, think like him, laugh like him, walk like him. I have become the role, just like him. An impossible dream. A messed-up fairytale with an unknown ending. See, this rabbit has been led to believe that River Phoenix is alive and has chosen me to tell his story.
The truth shall set him free. This is why I keep taking the bait. I treated art as the supreme reality and life as a mere mode of fiction. My sentiments exactly, Strange Vine - Various - Songwriters.de - Split Single (CD). I sink in deep mire, where there is no standing: I am come into deep waters, where the floods overflow me. By the time Halloween rolled around I was ready for an end. I expected something significant to happen, something or someone to be revealed.
They were giving me clues and hints but never actually providing any kind of truth. I kept hanging on thinking eventually someone somewhere would come clean. Eventually, River would show up.
It was like my blog had come to life and sucked me in. Suddenly I was River Phoenix. That sounds terrifying. I know that. People can go through phases influenced by shifts in neurotransmitters. High dopamine levels can be associated with seeing patterns beyond what are there.
There can be a variety of causes for that, including Candida overgrowth, which can cause a sense of instability and anxiety. For example, if serotonin is low, dopamine can go high.
You probably know this, but a good way to bring up serotonin is by avoiding simple carbs and replenishing the gut with probiotics through raw fermented foods and killing off the harmful bacteria with herbs such as oil of oregano.
How would they know that? What in the world was Candida overgrowth anyway? I reckoned maybe my second brain could figure that one out, right after I replenished it with fermented foods. Tantra, by the way, is an Eastern religious practice centered around eroticism and sex which are used in rituals to transform the deity within, aka, sex magick. Another insignificant coincidence?
My center was God, my family, and my job — I felt all three slipping away. Called in sick twice. Left work for about an hour and a half without telling anyone, without clocking out. Arrived later only to take an emergency leave to keep my dead celebrity, cyber-boyfriend from leaving. Whether real or imagined, it controlled me. Whether the wizards behind the curtain exist or not, I was under their trance.
Trolls never admit to being trolls any more than the devil speaks his true purpose. I promise, it can happen to anyone. Predictive programming? I rebuke them both. Our water was shut off Halloween morning, something about the bill getting lost in the mail, and the toilets at work went into overtime. After using the third stall, I stood transfixed as the toilet continuously flushed itself. Once again, I was pulled in. A daisy chain, I researched weeks later, is a wiring scheme in electronic engineering in which multiple devices are wired together in sequence or in a ring — a daisy chain, weaved-together like a loom.
We spent Halloween night at a local pub. I expected something to happen. Surely, someone would reveal themselves to me, maybe even his best friend in disguise again.
We were approached by numerous strange men that night, but one guy, no, two guys in particular peaked my interest. The first guy that approached our table asked me to dance.
Once outside, we saw a guy in a blue Mustang leaning out of the passenger side, puking. His long hair covered his face as he sat hunched over in the seat with a couple of guys surrounding him. He then asked what my astrological sign was. The scene was all too familiar to me — the blue car, the sick passenger, his friends gathered around him, Halloween night… they were trying to show me something.
Another guy approached me not long after I returned to our table. He seemed familiar though. Although the details are a bit foggy, I do remember him saying something about algorithms. I left the bar drunk, and, once again, wondering if I had just met a famous insider. I thought. I concluded that I was, indeed, being watched. In the days following, I texted back and forth with the first guy I met. He sent me pictures of his car, the blue Mustang, as well as pictures of himself, most of which always looked different.
In one picture he had a long beard, in another picture he was clean shaven, he appeared scrawny in one and well-built in another. He sent me pictures of himself at work as a Machinist giving the thumbs up and winking. At one point he even called me on the phone and said he was on his way over. At first, I truly did believe that he was somehow connected to River, like he was some sort of messenger or something, but I had grown weary of mind-games, messengers and clues.
The call suddenly dropped and then he called back about five minutes later. I already had my suspicions that, they too, were involved, now it was all but confirmed. I agreed to go but cancelled before the weekend arrived. I was fishing. He told me about his roommate who sat in a dark room all day smoking cigarettes and I made another loose connection pertaining to my own roommate as well as myself who would sit in the dimly lit garage chain-smoking.
In the end, it was another lead that led nowhere, and I cut ties with both men. Halloween had come and gone, and nothing changed. I still felt like I was being watched. I still felt controlled by some unseen force. I began seeing that blue Mustang everywhere I went as well as the big brown bubba truck with the Jesus bumper sticker. As I was leaving the neighborhood one day on my way to the bar no less I saw a young man digging a shallow trench in their gutter with a stream of water flowing through it.
I stared at the young man, and he at me, before driving off to have a couple of beers by myself. It was an endless search. Where was River? What was happening to me? Where does it all lead? I sat outside at the bar watching the boats float by on the lake, their navigational lights hypnotizing as the sun disappeared into the horizon. A large bird appeared just within my eyeshot and seemed to linger in place as if watching me as intently as I watched him.
A love song on the radio about green eyes brought me to near tears as I nursed my beer and avoided eye contact with the growing crowd. It felt like the entire place was staring at me. Everyone that walked by glanced in my direction until the unwanted attention became too much. I drove home that evening with blurred vision as the normally clear radio stations tuned in and out between the buzz and static of white noise.
When I was able to hear a song, the lyrics always seemed to be directed entirely at me as if some all-powerful force were commanding it so, a universal DJ who always knew exactly what to play. As the days dragged by, my paranoia and emotional instability intensified. I was in tears praying for his safety, and without even turning a page, opened up my Bible to Psalms. I looked down and read the exact verse I needed to hear:.
Deliver me from the workers of iniquity, and save me from bloody men. It later dawned on me that the verse was probably meant for me, not River. In fact, my love for River soon turned to resentment. I no longer cared where he was or what he had to say, I just wanted my life back. To be quite blunt, I find him to be a bit of a manipulative jerk. Identity theft? Same thing. I have nothing to steal.
To prove a point, send out a message, teach them about right and wrong? Big brother. The Illuminati. The powers that be. Mind control. Watch what you say. I was outside on the porch one night deep in thought about my current situation when the tone of my voicemail startled me.
I looked down and wondered why it never rang. Cold chills ran down my spine, but I figured there had to be a logical explanation. They were mocking me, yes, they had taken over my phone, maybe, but there was no way they, he, or it could read my very thoughts. It was a setup. I was tired, physically and emotionally.
My body was exhausted, and although it was mid-November, I was constantly sweating and in need of water. It was no longer about him. It was about me. Strange Vine - Various - Songwriters.de - Split Single (CD) outside at work one day I noticed a geeky looking guy, kind of overweight, reading a paperback book with a huge cup of water in his hand, at least, I assumed it was water. It was like one of those Big Gulps except ten times bigger. The guy smirked as he got up from the bench and walked away without even looking up from his book.
Another messenger with another clue. The hypnotic water, the Illuminati, the theory of a ritual sacrifice, dog god, sex-kitten programming, the dead dog with the pink collar in my yard, the Halloween dream — all the pieces were falling into place. I was River Phoenix, and I was destined to suffer the exact same fate.
They had set a trap for me. They dug a pit and waited for my inevitable fall. It was all beginning to make horrible sense. I believe in the power of prayer, the power of belief, faith, the power of love, the righteous path. Like moths to the light we look high and low for the answers we seek. Some seek council from the clergy, others pay some self-proclaimed psychic who tells you what you want to hear.
Some look for answers in tarot cards…within yourself you find the answers, because within yourself you find God, the Holy Spirit, the Living Water. A few days before Thanksgiving on November 20,the story finally reached its climax. I sat at my desk at work with my earbuds in trying to ignore the warm, burning sensation spreading across my forehead. I was sweaty and dehydrated, my hands were cracked and pealing in places, my muscles twitched here and there, but it was the hot frothy feeling in my forehead that caused me real concern.
I ripped out my earbuds and went outside for a smoke. Although close to tears, the rage mounted within me. The burning sensation intensified as did the muscle spasms. An ambulance raced by with its lights on. A man with a tall cowboy hat drove by and spit out his car window. Everywhere I looked cars were backing up, and then it hit me — The Law of Reversal.
You know, Satan is god, the inverted cross, dark is light. Aleister Crowley taught that those who want fame, power, spell-casting abilities, and demons at their beck and call should practice this law. In order to recognize the godhead within, as well as to know the past, present, and future, he encouraged his students to practice talking, walking, thinking, and playing phonograph records backwards.
The end, or shall I say, the beginning was in sight. I believed that if certain events in my life that had occurred over the past four months were repeated in a backwards motion, the curse would be broken. I got back to my desk and listened to that first voicemail message, the one with the white noise, backwards, no wait, forward and then backwards, whatever.
I read over my blog again, listened to some of the same music, talked to the same people, and when I went back outside on my last break, I saw the blue Lincoln town car drive by. Instantly, that awful feeling of blind dizziness washed over me. I broke out into a sweat, my body trembled, and my forehead sizzled from the inside out. Obscenities flew out of my mouth as I quickly moved over to the wooden bench.
After posting a Bible verse on my blog and asking for prayers, I raced home in a fit of rage. How I successfully maneuvered the ten-minute drive to my house, God knows. I turned the corner onto my street where a large bonfire lit up the neighborhood and the burning of my brain reached epic proportions. Pins and needles burrowed into my forehead and minor tremors coursed through my limbs, but it came in waves. The cresting white-tips, the strong undercurrent, the thick salty foam and then the ocean goes calm again.
My skin dried out like a raisin and I felt the energy being sucked from my body — here comes another one. Rage took hold of me again as I stumbled out of my car and marched directly into the backyard.
On shaky knees, I stood on a chair, mouthed some obscenities and flipped off the neighbor in the green house. No response. No red light, no yellow light, no swaying curtains — nothing but darkness. Calm downI told myself. Stay calm, stay calm, stay calm … I ran inside and checked my blog for comments, nothing. I steadied my breath and loaded a bowl of weed — two tokes was all it took.
The cresting white-tips flooded my brain again with blinding pins and needles. Sweat poured from my skin and saturated my clothes. I grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and retreated to the garage to chain-smoke. A loud voice in my head told me to get on my knees and pray, which I did. When I got back to my room, I chugged some water, cracked open my Bible and began reading, but the rage mounted.
The boiling froth fermented my brain as I threw down my Bible, cursed God, and crawled across the floor to retrieve my journal. My skin grew tight around my bones as if I was turning into a stone sculpture, and my bodily functions lost all control. A loud ringing blared through my ears as I struggled to remain conscious. I began writing down everything that had happened over the past four months backwards. The wave subsided again as I leaned against my bed and waited for the next one.
I felt dead inside. No hope. No tears. No passion. No emotions. I was alive but dead. A still small voice told me to call my aunt, so I did.
I knew I was dying. My sight clouded over, and my ears burned with such intensity I thought my head might burst into flames. Dear God, another bizarre case of spontaneous combustion!
Heavy waves of white foam flooded my brain, a thick, acidic substance that coated my frontal lobe and spread down to my spinal cord. My heart pounded. My body trembled. My skin dried out as if a vampire had just sucked all the fluid from my veins.
My face became so tight and leathery I was positive I was somehow transforming into a reptile. Death was surely only a few seconds away as I cried out in agony and fought off eternal darkness. I was cursed!
It had to be a curse from some high-ranking witch, the one responsible for making my life complete hell for the past three months. Crowleyan black magic. Death by dehydration, just like that poor dog! On the verge of collapsing face first on my bedroom floor, I somehow found my cell phone and dialed straight to my aunt. Her chipper voice did little to calm my frantic state of being. I was dying. I could feel the energy leaving my body as the sound of a speeding train laid in on the horn non-stop.
The freedom train. My freedom train. In a broken and barely audible voice I asked my aunt to pray for me. I remained on my knees and bawled like a child while she prayed over me through the speaker phone. Seizures threatened to overtake my body and that heavy brain froth worsened with each sip of water I took. The bigger the gulp, the more intense the sensation became until my brain fizzled out and death would surely prevail.
Water was the poison that my body desperately craved. It was as if that part of me was somehow blocked. I felt dead inside, a rebellious child for which God no longer had a use. On shaky knees, I picked myself up off the floor and used the wall to guide me into the kitchen where I grabbed a Coke out of the fridge. My aunt continued praying but I was the walking dead void of hope and cursed by the devil himself.
The waves of panic and impeding fear of death subsided a bit as I sat down on the bathroom floor and attempted to smoke a cigarette. I threw open the window letting the cool night air filter through while my aunt recited scripture after scripture. I wanted to feel God again. At one point in the early s, a good friend of mine even became their drummer for a few years when they made the move to Los Angeles.
My musical tastes have changed quite a bit over the past decade-anda-half, and admittedly I fell out of touch with their past few albums. Who knows … they may have a new fan on their hands.
A couple times a year I like to utilize this column to highlight upcoming local concerts and events that are helping raise funds or awareness for local charities and non-profit organizations.
Comedian Aja Mae will host the event, which kicks off at 8 p. Check out Facebook. Organizers are also asking for household items to be donated mattress covers, blankets, pillows, stuffed animals, etcas well as baby items diapers, baby wipes, highchairs, car seats, etc. Visit Holydiversac. Also be sure to visit Weaveinc. This all-ages event will run from 4— p. Visit Thestarletroom.
The day-to-day features of Facebook lost their luster a long time ago. To me, nothing sounds worse than logging on to Facebook to see what everyone thinks about the current slate of democratic candidates and their odds against the big orange monster currently residing in the White House.
Guess what? There is almost no way to avoid hearing about this election as it is. The political ads are in heavy rotation all over television and the internet, and have been for months. Those come in addition to the three mailers a day I was getting from that rich jerk, Mike Bloomberg, before he dropped out. At least on television, there are guidelines and rules about what can be said in campaign ads. Facebook decided the best thing it could do would be to basically not monitor political ads at all.
Zuckerberg et al. In several interviews since then, the culprits have explained that focusing on the elections and especially on Facebook proved to be the most successful way to promote content and make money. They just want you to give them more personal information they can sell to advertisers who will feed you more ads on Facebook. Facebook is not going to draw a line between ads for products and ads for politics and hold the latter to a higher standard.
Well, I say to hell with them; play all the un-vetted advertisements you want, Facebook. Care to join me? Please support the advertisers that support Submerge! This publication would not be possible without our wonderful advertisers. Perhaps you are a library attendee yourself and the magnificence of our library system is nothing new.
In the recent primary election, you may have stopped in at a local library to cast your vote. Chances are that library is part of the Sacramento Public Library system. With approximately 4. This system is home to about 8, different programs each year. The whole idea is to get these difficult topics out in an environment where everyone can be heard and respected. Another special event that Sacramento locals look forward to is the Authors Uncovered series. These events host world-renowned authors who discuss varying topics with the audience.
In DecemberSacramento native Dr. Cornel West presented at the Sacramento Central Library. Prior to the event, Sass had contacted West requesting his attendance. Anywhere else people would pay big money to see him.
I felt this was his gift to his home of Sacramento. Many people are moving toward ebooks and audiobooks, in which the library. As Sacramento continues to expand as an artistic and creative city, growing a library system based on community involvement is crucial. With experience in growing a successful library system in cities such as Portland, Sass understands the needs of a creative, diverse and thriving city. The Library of Things rents out items such as projectors and power washers; free after-school meals are provided to youth; the seed library provides seeds for the home garden; SMUD-hosted energy conservation workshops help families save money and the environment; Zip Books offer books delivered to your door that are not available through the library; Book Club in a Box makes the next meeting that much easier; museum passes are offered for free and discounted prices throughout the state; the Makerspace is filled with tools such as a 3D printer; genealogy professionals help understand your ancestry; the list goes on and on and on.
Our library system is an integral part of our community and is a building block to the future of our connectedness as a city. To find more information, visit Saclibrary. Michelle Obama is the epitome of a self-made social justice Queen! As First Lady, Obama aided the United States in all types of progress and change—socially, financially, ethically, etc. Inthe stylish workaholic released her second book, Becoming, a memoir. Obama is also a wildly inspiring speaker.
Originally only one show was listed at 8 p. The tour then happily added another earlier show the same day at 3 p. There are also ticket options for the post-show VIP package, which includes private entrance and a meet-and-greet. For more information, visit Golden1center. Grab your tickets and experience the 27th annual Taste of Yountville! This special one-day affair is on March 21 from 11 a. Enjoy plenty of food and bevvies with world-class live music entertainment and multiple superb cooking demonstrations from notable chefs like Simon Majumdar, Joy Bauer, Jessie James Decker and more!
The talent coming out of both venues are highly premier. For the foodies, they will find sample tastings by numerous highly rated establishments like Basalt, Bottega, Bounty Hunter and Blossom Catering. April Ready for laughs? Whitney Cummings is a woman who takes on many roles. She has even launched her own podcast, titled Good For You. Lest you forget, Cummings is no stranger to the stage. Can I Touch It?
Doors open at 6 p. For more information, visit Crestsacramento. Also, watch out for Cummings as she will star and executive produce a new half-hour comedy for Amazon, Good People.
Open Thursday—Sunday and school holidays in Marchthe courses are set in the greenest of forests and will keep aerial enthusiasts challenged in the most fun way possible. This experience is meant to bring people together and off their electronics—to come back to Earth and live in the present. Each route known as a parcour starts in the bewildering trees. You will climb up into these billowing areas with a rope ladder.
The instructors will then help you negotiate precarious bridges and obstacles that will challenge your balance. Adults 18 and older must sign a waiver and usually need no extra supervision. The establishment asks you to please call or email to make a booking. For session times, please see the availability in the booking calendar and for more information visit Treetopsac. Hear me out.
A large part of the book involves his journey to becoming, well, Stephen King—and it all starts with Carrie. You know the story; young girl is bullied, gains superpowers as she goes through puberty and then young girl proceeds to wreak absolute havoc. Sound familiar? Another Stephen King link.
How exciting! This series is actually based on a graphic novel by Chris Forsman, who also wrote The End of the Fucking World—another great series that you can watch on Netflix if you enjoy extreme teenage angst. Adapted for the screen by Jonathan Entwistle and the producers of Stranger Things Rand Geiger, Dan Cohen and Shawn Levythis series provides a quick gut-punch of seven episodes at about 20 minutes each.
So, like a swift explosion, the series comes and goes. Her father has just died unexpectedly, her best friend is ignoring her to hang out with the star football player, and. Her mom is a workaholic trying to provide for the family, and Syd only ever argues with her.
Her kid brother is annoying. So when her school counselor suggests she write down all her innermost feelings in a journal, Syd complies. As one can imagine, writing down your innermost feelings when you can make things fly and Strange Vine - Various - Songwriters.de - Split Single (CD) with your mind—that might not be the best idea.
But because protagonists must make bad decisions, she does. As Syd begins to discover that she can make things fly quite violently through the air whenever she gets filled with anger, she tries to wrangle it and keep the secret.
As she struggles with the raging hormones of a teenager crushing over her two best friends, we see all the typical tropes of teenager drama—just trying to survive the cruel, cruel world of high school.
Where the show falters is. Imagine the cast of The Breakfast Club if they were boiled down in fivesecond descriptions. Without that limit, I would imagine these characters breaking outside the constraints of their stereotypes.
Perhaps with season two—if there is a season two—we will get to know the kids a bit better.
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